Sure, exercise is a great way to relieve stress and improve your sleep. But so is enjoying a little one-on-one time with you and your body. Masturbation is a safe and natural way to feel good, discover what gets you hot, and release built-up sexual tension. Keep reading to learn more about masturbating with a vagina, how you can get started, and what you can do to really turn up the heat.
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Do it face down
Porn isn't exactly famed for its realism. Women masturbate with legs splayed and backs arched, orgasming after a few minutes of frantic rubbing and moaning. But in reality, those positions aren't necessarily the most conducive to pleasure for women. What might seem hot in a male fantasy — which informs much of the porn we watch — isn't always close to what actually gets women off. I must admit, it hadn't occurred to me that the way I masturbate might have been influenced by the porn I was privy to growing up. Given that many British women received little or no information about female self-pleasuring during sex ed lessons, many of us have been left to fill in our knowledge gaps with porn. A global survey of over 10, people by sex toy company Tenga found just 14 percent of British women learned about sexual pleasure during sex ed at school, and 17 percent of women learned about masturbation. Sex educator Ruby Rare says that much of mainstream hardcore porn shows female masturbation in a very performative way and perpetuates a trope of "a woman lying down with her legs as far wide as humanly possible. Always eager to unlearn habits formed because of the male gaze, I spoke to sex educators and women who masturbate about female self-pleasure positions that aren't shown in mainstream porn.
Masturbation is a deeply personal activity—what feels good for one person can be a total fail for another. Yet when a woman is depicted on screen pleasuring herself, she's typically shown on her back in a satin robe on a luxurious king-size bed, or reclining in a steamy bubble bath illuminated by candles. Gauzy scenes like these are not what masturbation looks like to most women, including the ladies we spoke to. Use the techniques these 17 women lay out for inspiration and motivation.